Heart to heart

Round & About

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Rufus Wainwright, musician, dad and all-round superstar, chats to Rachel Wakefield ahead of his UK & world tour

Rufus Wainwright has sung jazz with Robbie Williams; crooned ballads with George Michael; created dance music with Mark Ronson; sung Leonard Cohen’s Hallelujah to The Queen, and, if further approval were needed, Elton John has stated: “He’s the greatest songwriter on this planet.”

Rufus has also been gifted with a rich musical heritage: he’s the son of acclaimed folk singers Loudon Wainwright III and Kate McGarrigle, and is brother to musicians Martha Wainwright, Lucy Wainwright Roche and Sloan Wainwright.

So, you might expect this American-Canadian singer-songwriter to be somewhat aloof. He’s not. “Oh, I’m the biggest prima donna when it comes to the recording studio,” he exclaims, but on stage, you’re only as good as your last performance. I’m excited to be coming to the UK,” “I have a special core fanbase here who follow me from concert to concert. It’s all very innocent.”

Rufus has recorded eight albums of original music and numerous film soundtracks. His work ranges from melody-driven pop to highbrow opera to piano torch songs to super eccentric stuff, even setting Shakespeare sonnets to music. “Oh, I frustrate! Marketing can’t put me in a box!” laughs Rufus, who is 44. “At my age, I’m no longer flavour of the month. And besides, when I try and pose for pubicity shots, well it’s a disaster: what I think is sexy and sultry, I often look angry and confused.”

Rufus is very driven. “With music, it’s the melodies that remain, not the personalities,” he states. “You listen to hundred-year-old operas, and they are fresh and present. This is my aim. Never to be defined by the media , always the music. I believe this has been my saving grace. My voice is too unique and my musical sensibilities are too sophisticated to capture. So, my ability to evade capture, has captured my audience’s loyalty.”

For his All The Poses, 20th Anniversary Tour, Rufus has picked 11 dates for the UK. With just a handful of dates, you do have to wonder if there is an ulterior motive to the choice of venues, which begin at Basingstoke’s The Anvil moving to Kenwood house, London, with a few smaller venues, including Whitley Bay and Bexhill-on-Sea.

The short visit may have something to do with being a dad to his seven-year-old daughter, Viva, whom he co-parents with childhood friend Lorca, the daughter of Leonard Cohen. But, Rufus reveals: “I’m writing an opera about Britain, which will be published in October, it’s got Romans and Celtics and that’s all I can tell.” He gushingly adds: “I love the nomadic differences with each town here. The mystical qualities of the landscape awestruck me as a child, touring with my father. I get lost in ancient dreams at every turn.”

Please visit www.rufuswainwright.com

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Good truck

Liz Nicholls

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Liz Nicholls chats to musician and dad Gaz Coombes, 42, whose acclaimed new album World’s Strongest Man is out now and appears at Truck festival in Steventon in July

Q. Hello Gaz, I love your new album! Are you most proud of this one?
“Thanks! It’s difficult to compare albums, y’know, like children! This album is still new and fresh, but I feel really good about it. The last three or four years have been the most creative of my life; it’s been a lot of fun.”

Q. Do you get recognised a lot when out and about?
“In Oxford, I’m just not a big deal, wandering along Cowley Road! I moved back just after my mum died to be closer to my dad and we haven’t looked back. I’m so at home here.”

Q. Where are your fave hang-outs?
“Jericho – I love The Harcourt Arms. We’re out in a village now, but when we were living on Cowley Road and my wife was in Banbury Road, Jericho was central and it’s cropped up in my lyrics! Last weekend Jools and I got a babysitter and went on a bit of a pub crawl with walks around Port Meadow – a magical place.”

Q. Oxford is a guitar music powerhouse, starting in your Supergrass days. Do you guys all hang out?
“Well yes! Loz and I hang out as he plays drums in my live band, when he’s not with Ride, and I see Mark Gardener [also of Ride]. When I was at Courtyard Studio recording this album, Colin Greenwood [of Radiohead] came by, for a cuppa and ended up playing bass on Oxygen Mask. He’s a fab guy, is Colin. The guys in my band are all local – I feel lucky that I’ve picked the cream of Oxford players. So yeah, it’s all subtley incestuous!”

Q. Anyone else you’d like to collaborate with?
“Ah, I heard something in my head a few months ago and contacted Nick Cave because I thought he’d be perfect. Unfortunately we couldn’t make any studio time work, but these things happen organically. I’d love to do some soundtracks…”

Q. Do you love vinyl?
“Yeah! It’s how I play music at home. I used to always pick some up on tour and don’t so much now, probably because of how accessible music is now on phones, it makes us lazy. But record releases are special – getting a box delivered, in classic Spinal Tap, style is so exciting.”

Q. Which new acts do you like?
“The band Shame are cool; honest rock ‘n’roll with depth. I also like Willie J Healey who’s a local boy, good and challenging. I’m always looking forward to what Goat are doing next – I’m a big fan of Goat.”

Q. What’s your fave gig venue?
“I’ve played some amazing venues over the years, like the Hollywood Bowl. But as a solo artist, I love the sound and space of The Forum in Kentish Town and Camden’s Roundhouse. I played a tiny basement club in Berlin last night and it was a great vibe.”

Q. What about festivals?
“Festival Number 6 is great; a real experience in a quirky, colourful town. And I always really enjoy Truck, nice and local!”

˜Truck festival is 20th-22nd July in Steventon, Oxfordshire. Visit www.truckfestival.com

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Rotten luck

Liz Nicholls

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Liz Nicholls chats to Johnny Rotten, AKA John Lydon, 62, ahead of The Public Image Is Rotten Summer Tour of Europe and Japan, marking Public Image Ltd’s 40th anniversary

Q. Hello! Which date on this world tour are you most excited about?
“The first one is always the most fearful. But then often your first gig is your best, because of stress. I’m always nervous; I leave myself practically naked when I go on stage. All my defences and ego, I leave in the dressing room… it’s a hard parting! But as soon as you see their eyes, you’re being human together and I love that. That’s why I love these small, intimate venues.”

Q. Are you enjoying making music more than ever?
“Yes! It’s 40 years rewarded well, being in PiL now. I’m happy to say I’m working with real friends. We respect each other; we’re not laying down booby traps to make each other look foolish. And I’ve had that from bands [chuckles]… no doubt I’ve done it myself, too! But you can’t live in that world of adversity and animosity all the time. You just gotta stop it; start being reasonable. It’s a surprise to me!”

Q. How does London today compare to the old Kings Road days of punk?
“Well it’s more Topshop than interesting and avant garde. But I’ll always love a British pub. If there’s a bunch of old people, all the better, thank you.”

Q. Who’s your favourite author?
“Dickens; he gives a child’s view of a cruel world; there’s hope. Look to the children; they’re the ones closer to God.”

Q. What makes you angry as you get older?
“Little things, like my knackered big left toe can annoy the hell out of me. But it’s always bigger issues. The disenfranchised. The rich getting richer. So here I am, fully armed to combat that!”

Q. Is anger an energy and does politics anger you?
“Yes. There’s fake news on both sides of the agenda now, all around the world. Everyone has a personal vendetta which they’ve transferred into an agenda a la politics. As for politicians, is there a football pundit who doesn’t talk absolute b*****s? It’s the same with politicians. They separate us into ‘camps’. That’s why I loved punk initially; it broke down barriers like the north vs south, same with rave. I see the world as us: all of us. Now I’m only nasty to subjects and topics, not human beings.”

Q. You live in LA – what’s the buzz like over the Royal Wedding there?
“The Americans go mad for all the pomp, in a very Walt Disney, childlike way. I see no harm! I love a royal wedding because I get to see the old spitfires and bombers flying over Buckingham Palace… that is a sight for me!”

Q. Do you have much vinyl?
“An enormous amount; to the extent I’ve damaged the structure of my house. I had to put RSJs in! My collection’s the weight of a baby elephant, maybe two. I love vinyl, same as I books; I love the texture, the feel.”

Q. Who’s your favourite artist?
“Kandinsky: free-flowing vivid images. I also love Hundertwasser; taking ideas from the canvass into architecture.”

Visit www.pilofficial.com for details of a new 40th anniversary box set and gigs on the tour.

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Shared experience

Liz Nicholls

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Liz Nicholls chats to broadcaster and campaigner Jonathan Dimbleby, and his charity Dimbleby Cancer Care

Q: Good morning! Have I caught you in the middle of your exercise routine?
“Are you joking?! My mornings, on school days, are spent encouraging my offspring with times tables and spelling. Then I have porridge, work on my book and have a light lunch. But I try every day, even on a gloomy one like today, to walk for at least an hour and a half. Because I live in Bristol, which is so hilly, I know it does me good. When we moved here 18 months ago, I’d be out of breath when I got to Clifton but now I can walk it in half the time without noticing. I hate gyms – they make me feel like a hamster. The human body is made to walk and, in my case, to play tennis. It used to be made for riding horses and a whole range of other activities. But basically, I walk and play tennis… and fail.”

Q: Your charity was founded in memory of your dad Richard. Do you think of him often?
“Yes, I’m 21 years older than he was when he died. My father remains part of my life, as does my late mother; I’m blessed by having wonderful parents. You do regret that they can’t see your children grow up, how they turn out. But we learn to live in life with our sorrows and regrets as well as our joys. We manage pain as we manage delight.”

Q: Dimbleby Cancer Care helps with some of the non-clinical aspects of life with cancer doesn’t it?
“We know we make a difference – we support the work done within the NHS, including at our cancer centre at Guy’s and Thomas’s [in south London] and fund a benefits advice service. It’s difficult to exaggerate how support for people living with cancer, and their carers, can transform lives which is where our cancer care map comes in. Acute anxiety exacerbates living with cancer hugely. We offer complementary therapies, advice, support; a counsel of comfort and hope.”

Q. What’s your greatest journalistic moment?
“I think when I ‘exposed’ a terrible famine in Ethiopia and started an appeal which raised, in today’s money, something in the order of £70m. I’ve been locked up in police cells, come under fire, all the things that happen to a front-line reporter. But I think my most memorable interview was with Gorbachev. I thought; ‘here’s an extraordinary man who can change the world’. And he did.”

Q. What’s your favourite book?
“It changes all the time. I’m working on a second world war book so I try to read a novel or a biography to get away from that of an evening. My ‘desert island book’ would be Hardy’s The Mayor of Casterbridge.”

Q. Do you listen to much music?
“Yes – I go to a lot of concerts and listen to Radio 3 and am sometimes profoundly irritated by the presentation. But it makes our green and pleasant land a million times greener and pleasanter.”

Q. Do you enjoy the Walk50?
“This is our fourth and I usually walk the 50km because I’m so competitive but there are 25km and 12.5km options. Walking along the river at night, watching dawn break is beautiful; a real feelgood factor. We live in hard times, but it’s an unadulterated delight.”

Visit www.dimblebycancercare.org and www.cancercaremap.org

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Fighting Talk

Round & About

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Comedian Lucy Porter brings her smash-hit Edinburgh Fringe show Choose Your Battles to various venues Peter Anderson catches up with her…

In Choose your Battles Lucy Porter, with the aid of the audience and a punchbag, works out when she should stick to her guns and fight and when she can use her disarming charm to defuse a situation. I caught up with her and, while ducking the boxing glove, asked her about her life and the tour.

Q. Is your current tour based purely on your life and experience, or observation as well?
“It’s a bit of a mixture. Most of the material comes from my own experience, but my audience are wonderful at coming up afterwards or emailing me and saying ‘that story you told reminded me of something awful my husband did…’ or ‘when my kids were little, I found this was a really useful tip…’ so I get a lot of helpful feedback that finds its way into the show.”

Q. Have your husband or children seen the show?
“Oh goodness, no! My whole act relies on the fact that my husband is looking after the kids while I’m out talking about them on stage. I don’t know what I’ll do when the children are old enough to see my act – I’ll have to change it and just talk about our cats.”

Q. How long does it take you to collate and write material for a show?
“It’s a never-ending process of writing, presenting stuff to the audience and then revising it. It’s 100% my favourite thing about live stand-up; the fact that no two shows are alike. The skeleton of this show was written for the Edinburgh festival in August last year, and some of my favourite bits have stayed in, but there’s always stuff that’s new this week, today, or even on the night.”

Q. As someone who prefers not to make a fuss, and carefully choose your battles would you like to have lived in 1717?
“Ooh, I hope you’re referring here to my play the Fair Intellectual Club, which was set in 1717 and concerned a group of young women who decided to set up a secret society for studying maths, physics, astronomy and all the other things that ‘nice girls’ weren’t supposed to concern themselves with. I hope I’d always have been a mouthy, opinionated and difficult woman like they were.”

Q. You write both comedies and dramas. Is it easy to switch between the two?
“I never had any ambition to write drama, but as I’ve got older I’ve realised my life experience has gifted me some serious points to make. That said, even when I’m writing drama I can’t help playing for laughs sometimes. I hope never to have to take life, or myself, too seriously.”

Q. If you were stranded on a desert island, who would like to be stranded with?
“I love my own company and I need a holiday, so I’d be delighted to be on a desert island for at least a week. If I could be stranded with Dolly Parton and Paul McCartney, I could have the music and good company as well.”

Q. You are appearing at The West End Centre in Aldershot. What memories do you have of appearing there?
“The West End Centre is one of the nicest and most welcoming places I’ve ever encountered. Also, the people who run it have impeccable taste in music (and comedy too of course!).”

For more details visit www.lucyporter.co.uk

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Paloma power

Liz Nicholls

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We chat to musician Paloma Faith,

Q. Hello Paloma – thanks for your time and congratulations on your new arrival! How’s life changed?
“I’m trying to juggle being a mother and a singer. I have no idea how I’m managing, but I am somehow! I do feel my approach to music has changed since I’ve become a parent – which does have an impact. With difficult things happening in the world, you feel protective and want to make things comfortable for your family. I think things are changing in our history and maybe not for the better, which is something I’m concerned about. I feel there’s a sense of duty to talk about events.”

Q. You’ve been keen to shield your youngster from the press and paparrazi haven’t you?
“I value my privacy more so than ever now, as it’s a real responsibility being a parent. I want my child to know itself first rather than everyone else feeling that they know all about them.”

Q. Growing up in East London and studying at the Northern School of Contemporary Dance, did you always have an inkling you’d become a singer?
“Growing up in Hackney, I was surrounded by lots of different types of music – from my mum, I remember listening to plenty of revolutionary music from the 1960s such as Bob Dylan, while my dad was into jazz, which is where my interest in all that comes from. Later, when I was studying, I got into R n B dancehall, and originally I wanted to be dancer. Then I did my musical theatre, and I think music just chose me.”

Q. Your album Do You Want The Truth or Something Beautiful? hit the top 10, and proceeded to lodge in the album charts for the next 100 weeks – how do you look back on it?
“Well, that was nearly 10 years ago, and it was what it was. I think it is great that I’ve managed to sustain a career as unfortunately not many people get to make more than one or two albums these days.”

Q. Your vocal abilities have continued to garner contrasts with the late Amy Winehouse – how do you feel about that?
“I’m flattered by comparisons to Amy. It’s not something I am offended by, though I am quite different. When she met me once, she asked if I played an instrument, but I said no, and she said that was a shame as she would have liked someone like me in her group. I was a massive fan of hers, and after watching the documentary about her life, I actually wrote a song for her, Price of Fame, which is on the new album. Her death was such a tragedy.”

Q. You were nominated several times for a Brit Award, with your persistence paying off two years ago – hurray! How did that feel?
“It was amazing to win the Brit Award and to finally gain some acknowledgement. I come from a long line of people that haven’t really been acknowledged for what they did… But I think there are a lot of people out there doing important work, like doctors and nurses who don’t get that recognition they should.”

Q. We’re looking forward to your tour and hear that you’re going to design some of your trademark show sets – are you excited?
“The only reason I do what I’m doing is because I love touring – as when I’m out there I am excited and feel that I’m in the right place.”

Please visit www.palomafaith.com

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Up swing

Liz Nicholls

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Liz Nicholls chats to ballroom dancer Anton du Beke

Q. Hello Anton – lovely to chat to you! I’ve just been shuffling about in the kitchen to your CD… Do you like January?
“Thank you – that’s exactly the reaction I wanted! Well, in January I’m so busy. I’m in the studio working on my tour. It’s incredibly exhausting and I have about a thousand steps to learn so my brain feels like it’s about to melt. I have songs to remember and chat to learn. Erin [Boag] and I tour every January, February, March. So I don’t get January blues. I always feel quite poor, though, because those credit card bills mount up and I’ve gone a bit too mad at Christmas again. 2017 has been the best year ever – getting married and doing so much great stuff.”

Q. Where are you now?
“In the living room at my house in Burnham Beeches. It’s a lovely part of the world. I don’t come from round here; I grew up in Sevenoaks and spent a number of years in central London. When I met Hannah she came from here and I’ve loved to be here and discover the area. Bucks is gorgeous and equidistant between the M4 and M40 which is perfect when I’m on the road. Take the dogs for a walk in the woods – we have two short-hair black-and-tan daschunds called Antoninus and Branston.”

Q. How do you stay healthy?
“We do eat pretty healthily. Hannah is a great cook and we never eat meals you grab out the fridge and shove in the oven. I don’t drink, I don’t smoke but I’ve always lived that kind of lifestyle – it’s not something I’ve worked at, it’s just normal for me.”

Q. Who were your early musical influences?
“Growing up, I fell in love with musicals. Fred Astaire and Gene Kelly were my heroes – I wanted to dance like them but didn’t know how I’d go from a church hall in Kent to being Fred Astaire! Sinatra and Sammy Davis Junior – those great entertainers – also impressed me, having an orchestra on stage. This album features a 36-piece orchestra who usually don’t do swing but were lovely. The string section were from the Royal Philharmonic – that’s how good they are.”

Q. It was a joy to watch you dancing with Ruth [Langsford] on Strictly at the end of last year! Did you get on with Ruth?
“Brilliant; she’s a joy. She and Eamonn are so funny and Ruth has the best ever sense of humour!”

Q. Do you see much live music?
“A little bit but I don’t go to many big concerts. I found when I went to a few when I was young that you’re just in the way of the performance if that makes sense at all? But I’m always listening to music on Spotify on my phone to find stuff to dance to! And I do love going to all the big shows.”

Q. Your good friend Bruce Forsyth died last year and I’m sorry for your loss. How have you coped with that?
“Thank you. It was a massive shame and a big shock. I spoke to him about two weeks before he passed away and he said he felt a bit better and had been on his exercise machine to start building his strength up. I’ve got a song on the album called Me And My Shadow which is about him and quite an important song to me. I still feel sad but lucky to have known him. People deal with it in their own way, but my life is better for having known him.”

Q. Have you got any dreams for this year?
“No! With the babies and getting married last year and the album and a great Strictly I feel really happy with my lot! All I’d like is more of the same, please… well, no more twins! Actually what I’d like is them to grow big and beautiful and happy.”

Visit www.antonanderin.com

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What Katie did next

Liz Nicholls

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Liz Nicholls chats to philanthropist, writer, TV presenter and former model Katie Piper

Q. Congratulations on your second baby. How did you find this pregnancy?
“I’ve really enjoyed it, other than the morning sickness in the first three months! Having a young child I’ve enjoyed being able to share the excitement with her and it’s special being able to watch the bump grow together – she’s even been telling everyone that she’s pregnant herself which is very funny!”

Q. Have you enjoyed creating your new maternity range [www.wantthattrend.com] and what are your fave items?
“I’ve loved creating it! During my previous pregnancy I struggled to find affordable maternitywear I liked and ended up wearing my husband’s wardrobe half the time. This time around I wanted to provide a maternity collection that gave not just me, but all pregnant women, the chance to feel good. I also wanted to ensure that no matter what the occasion – a party, picking up the kids from school, or even Christmas day – expecting mothers always have something to wear! I love all of the items. The Bardot Twist Front Detailed (£24.95) dresses are amazing but I love the Maternity Navy Strappy Wrap Over Culotte Jumpsuit (£24.95) for the day with a white T-shirt underneath and a comfy pair of white trainers!”

Q. What are your fondest memories of Hampshire growing up? “Hampshire is very close to my heart; I had a wonderful childhood there. I think my fondest memories would have to be in our family home with my lovely parents and brother and sister, Paul and Suzy, and just generally enjoying my youth at Harrow Way School.”

Q. Your foundation’s made a difference to so many others – what’s been the most rewarding moment so far?
“Thank you, The Katie Piper Foundation is so important and has been a huge part of my journey. I don’t think there’s one specific rewarding moment; each day I meet or hear from so many inspirational individuals.”

Q. What advice would you give to anyone going through the darkest of times?
“Remember, no matter how big or small your challenges might seem, there is always a confident way forward and people here to help.”

Q. What attitudes to body confidence do you most hope to pass to your children?
“It’s so important for parents to have a positive attitude about body confidence as this will be reflected in your child’s values and attitudes. So if I’m having a ‘fat’ day (let’s face it, we all have one in a while), I’d never say that to Belle. Words like ‘fat’ are an absolute no-go in our house; everyone is beautiful in their own way and it’s what’s on the inside that really matters!”

Q. Who are your heroes and why?
“My mum because she is so kind and resilient, and all of the amazing volunteers for The Katie Piper Foundation – I cannot thank them enough for their help and support.”

Q. What’s your favourite piece of music?
“Thriller by Michael Jackson – my favourite album and artist of all time!”

Q. I know you love writing – what is your favourite book?
“My favourite books are Richard Reed’s If I Could Tell You One Thing, Jo Malone’s autobiography and The Secret.”

Q. What’s your favourite food?
“It’d have to be something Italian; I love Italian, but I would only have it as a treat as normally I am very healthy!”

Q. What ambitions do you have for the future?
“To be happy and healthy. All I hope for is good health and happiness for all of my family. Work-wise, I have my first ever theatre tour What’s In My Head starting in March which is exciting as it will be intimate with my fans; I’ll discuss my own battles with anxiety and explain how I overcame it. Insecurities exist in us all of us and adversity is unavoidable but this is my chance to hopefully be able to help others learn how to manage it.”

Please visit www.katiepiperandyou.co.uk

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Digging deep

Round & About

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Peter Anderson chats to history buff and television star Sir Tony Robinson.

Q. What sparked your interest in history; was it Baldric as Blackadder went through the centuries?!
“It goes back to when I was a child and my dad told me of his time in World War II. He was posted to Scotland, met up with some Canadian soldiers and spent the war touring in a Canadian dance band. That made me think of him as a child learning what his father had done, and his father before him – the continuum of history.”

Q. Of all the stories of folklore, why do you think King Arthur has lasted so well?
“The Dark Ages are shrouded in mystery, but the stories of King Arthur held a romantic appeal. They were also seized upon by the Norman Kings keen to use their lineage from King Arthur to legitimise their claim to the throne. They sought to publicise all the stories that came out regarding King Arthur’s time.”

Q. What’s the significance of Round Tables?
“The Round Tables were a common item at tournaments as everyone could be equal in standing and speak. There is an example at York where guests sat in niches around the table and stepped forward to speak. But the best thing to compare is the corporate boxes around modern-day sports grounds like Wembley, where a lot of networking can be conducted alongside the sport or entertainment.”

Q. Did your time with the experts on Time Team,
including Jonathan, prepare you for this next event?
“Jonathan impressed me when he appeared on Time Team, and we have been friends ever since. He is an archaeologist, but specialises in standing archaeology, a lot of the work in Time Team was looking at holes in the ground and assessing what had been there; his expertise is looking at buildings still standing. He can look at a building and then guide you through clues he has spotted to all the various phases of construction within it. It is a remarkable skill.”

Q. Do you have a favourite period of history and would you fancy travelling back to it?
“I think Ellen Degeneres was right when she said now is the best time. There are so many things we take for granted now that were not available. However, from a point of intellectual curiosity I would love to go back to the time of King Alfred I. I find it so intriguing that someone could go from a small kingdom in the South West of England and in the space of a couple of years take on the invading Vikings, beat them and have the leader of the Vikings paraded through the streets wearing white and converting to Christianity. I would so love to find out how he achieved it.”

Q. Is there anything from history you’d still like to do a programme or talk on?
“So many! But the main one would be a programme that shows wars were not won so much by fighting on the battlefield but by organisation, the ability to move troops and equipment quickly, to supply them. I was lucky enough to film out in the middle of the Sahara Desert, in the middle of nowhere, the shifting sands had cleared to reveal a metalled road thrown up quickly by the Germans in World War II to move equipment. Now taken back and covered by the desert sands…”

Q. Who would be your perfect dinner party guests?
“King Alfred, Archbishop Asser, Oliver Cromwell, Sir Francis Walsingham, William and Robert Cecil. We are a little light on the ladies, so I think Eleanor of Aquitaine; rumour has it she was the one who was running the country.”

Q. Is there anything we could learn today from the Age of Chivalry?
“Definitely: the Chivalric Code held people together in times of crisis. It was a code of politeness, being honourable, with honesty and courtesy.”

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Feel the Byrne

Round & About

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Jonathan Lovett chats to comedian, actor, writer and dad of two Ed Byrne, 45, who has just embarked on his biggest ever tour to date, Spoiler Alert, following a sell-out success at this year’s Edinburgh Festival

Q. What is Spoiler Alert about…or is answering that a bit of a spoiler in itself?!
“Well, I called it that partly because if there were any bad reviews people wouldn’t read them because it would say ‘Spoiler Alert’ at the top! But it’s mainly because the theme of the show is the notion of how spoilt we are in general and how we’ve become quite mollycoddled as a nation. Stuff like having to push a button to start a car rather than turn a key because it’s such a great drudgery to turn a key these days. And how it’s the trivia stuff we act really spoiled about, whereas with the big stuff, such as politics, we seem to just accept how bad things are. There was a big women’s march after Trump was elected and some people were like ‘Uhhh. What are they complaining about? We don’t live in Saudi Arabia,’ with the implication being ‘Shut up, luv. We’re not stoning you to death, what are you bothered about?!’”

Q. If you had the opportunity to say something to Donald Trump what would it be?
“If I ever did have such a marvellous opportunity I’d have to look him straight in the eye and say, ‘You really are an awful person, aren’t you?’ or maybe I would just scream ‘STOP PAINTING YOURSELF ORANGE…YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS!’”

Q. You’ve just begun an epic tour. Do you love touring this much, Ed?
“If you are really famous you can just go and play the main cities and people from little towns will come into the big cities to come and see you. Whereas if you are just ‘that bloke on Mock the Week’ you have to go to those small towns. People from Evesham can’t be bothered to go to Birmingham to see me. So I have to go to Evesham.”

Q. What was your worst gig ever done and does it still haunt you? “I’m sometimes hired to do corporate gigs and now and it can be a real struggle. On occasions there is just no laughter at all and you’re up there in front of an audience who are just there for their own thing and perhaps you’re just not the right comedian for that particular crowd. I mean, Metallica are a great band, but if I booked them to play at my in-laws’ golden wedding anniversary it might not go down particularly well. I have been on stage in the past and just wished ‘God. I wish I was a stripper’ because I would’ve got a far better response from that audience then I ever would as a comedian!”

Q. I can testify you are very funny on stage. Were you the funniest kid in your class?
“I was the classic case of having to be funny to avoid being bullied, but even at school it was bigger, louder kids that were considered funnier. My humour was a bit nerdier. So at school I would be reciting Monty Python sketches and I would be met with a kind of, ‘What the flip are you on about?’ I was probably a little more ‘niche’ as a school kid than I am now and I used to play Dungeons & Dragons even as a teenager. My cousin and I were proper little geeks and I would go into school with a spring in my stride on a Monday morning having got my wizard to Level 14 the night before.”

Q. We’ve just seen you and best mate Dara O Briain on TV in Dara & Ed’s Road to Mandalay, a follow-up to Dara & Ed’s Great Big Adventure in which you travelled the Pan-American Highway. Where next for the intrepid duo?
“Well, if they do ask us to do another one, we are both quite keen on travelling through the Nordic countries. I think there will be a lot of mileage in that. We have a tendency to think of everyone up there as Swedish but it would be really interesting to get under the skin of these places and go, ‘Swedes are like this, and Danes like this, and the Finnish do this etc’… And, if we could get Abba to reunite, that would be good. I was talking to this guy in New Zealand who reckons he saw them all living and working together in this house in New Zealand and I was like ‘Really?!’”

Q. What’s the best thing or worst thing about Dara?
“I tell you what the most interesting thing is about Dara… he doesn’t know about spoons! If you showed him a spoon and said, ‘Now, is that a soup spoon or a dessert spoon?’ he’d be like, ‘It’s a bloody spoon!’ He knows big spoons and small spoons but in-between he doesn’t know anything about them! He only knows ‘spoon’ or ‘not spoon’.”

Visit www.edbyrne.com

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